Lippard.Multics 1986-01-06 11:07:17 mst Mon Subject: miscellaneous gripes and thoughts Date: Monday, 30 December 1985 13:34 mst From: Larry Polnicky To: {mbx >udd>m>jjl>misc>misc} I'm curious, how many people use the "budget plan" for their utilities ? I recently bought a condo and the first month's electric bill was $273. Everything in the house is electric. But that was a winter month and it covered 40 days and included a lot of usage by the builder. The next month's bill was under $100. So I called up the Baltimore Gas and Electric Company to get on the budget plan and they told me it would be $124 based on expected usage (since they had no history to compare to). Six months later, it was time to "settle the account" and I was ahead of the game, so I had a reduced bill. But they also notified me that my monthly bill would go up to $174 per month. I called them up and pointed out that besides that first month, all my usages were under $100, and so instead of raising my monthly amount, they should lower it. We "compromised": they decided to lower the amount they would raise it so that I would be paying $150 per month. (Great, I get 5% on my surplus!) They use a very simple algorithm: total usage for the period divided by number of months in the period. Two or three months later I noticed I had a surplus of $183, so I called up to ask to have it applied to the current bill. No way, I had to wait until the 6-month interval was up when we settle my account. So I griped and tried to explain that the algorithm was bad and that the first month was abnormal and biased the result. They said they could make a special audit and change my budget amount but that I could not use my surplus amount for 3 or 4 more months. So, I made a separate call to request that I be taken off the budget plan (the one circumstance in which you CAN use your surplus), waited a month or two without paying my bill to dissipate the backlogged amount (invoking the we-forgive-you-once-a-year provision to avoid late charges), and then calling back to get on the budget plan. Fortunately, they remembered that the auditor approved $100 per month. It's really wild stuff the way some of these things work ! Here's another one. Not only is waiting in line to buy presents in over- heated stores a real pain in the zorch, but waiting to take things back (when they have to fill out so many little slips of paper) can be pure agony. I waited in line about 10 minutes at the very same cashier counter that I had recently used to purchase something only to be told that I had to return the item to the department from which it came. It seems like if you can pay for any item in the store at any checkout counter, then you should be able to return it to any counter. But that is not the case. That was JCPenney, an otherwise excellent store. BTW, most of those conditionals, "if you can ..., then you should be able to ...", fail when discussing everyday activities like shopping or driving in traffic. At Montgomery Ward, I was temporarily relieved to find that they had special tables set up to take thing back instead of having to wait in a line filled with shoppers cashing in on those post-Christmas bargains. But they only gave me a little slip of paper. I had to wait in a second line at the cashier to get my credit. Then I recently got a ticket for going 53 in a 30 mph zone. Could hardly believe a 6 lane divided highway could have a speed limit of 30 mph. Such is the nature of speed traps. Don't try to fight those things in court either; everybody who did, on principle, suffered little or no reduction in fine. Those who admitted their guilt, sincerely apologized for inconveniencing the courts, and begged for mercy received greatly reduced fines, and in most cases (if she was cute), no points on the record. I give up. I'll just pay my quarter for air at the gas station and wait for a chance to get even whenever I can. Hey, how about those Blue Laws. In some states, like Texas, certain items can't be sold on Sunday. Why you can buy a Turkey but not a roasting pan is a real mystery to me. Why razor blades are banned is beyond me. In other states they have laws about buying alcohol on sunday before noon or on a holiday. That's the last time I wait until Christams day to buy the wine. In Maryland, you can't employ more than 3 people on Sunday so whole shopping malls are closed in some counties. Strange ! Or you have the situation where one Pizza Hut sells beer but one down the street doesn't. Why ? Some law about only one store per franchise per county can have a liquor license. What the $%&#$!% ??? This Christmas I tried to buy someone a kitchen apron. One store had it in housewares (makes sense). Another had it in women's under "uniforms" ! Yet another had it in linens. So you have this deep philosophic issue: Is a kitchen towel considered a linen or a houseware ?