Lippard.Multics 1985-02-12 15:35:02 mst Tue
Subject:  Doublespeak Awards
Source:  The Book of Lists (either #1, #2, or #3)

Col.  David H.  E.  Opfer, USAF (1974):  After a bombing raid, Colonel
Opfer, a press officer in Cambodia, complained to reporters, "You always
write it's bombing, bombing, bombing.  It's not bombing.  It's air
support."

Ron Zeigler (1974):  When asked whether a certain batch of Watergate
tapes was still intact, a question which would seem to have required a
simple answer of "yes" or "no", President Nixon's press secretary gave
the following 99-word reply:  "I would feel that most of the
conversations that took place in those areas of the White House that did
have the recording system would in almost their entirety be in
existence, but the special prosecutor, the court, and, I think, the
American people are sufficiently familiar with the recording system to
know where the recording devices existed and to know the situation in
terms of the recording process, but I feel, although the process has not
been undertaken yet in preparation of the material to abide by the court
decision, really, what the answer to that question is."

Yasser Arafat (1975):  Apparently a believer in the philosophy that
"love is hate" and "war is peace", the leader of the Palestine
Liberation Organization stated, "We do not want to destroy any people.
It is precisely because we have been advocating coexistence that we have
shed so much blood."

Harry Volweider (1975):  When asked why a black person had been rejected
for membership in the Springdale Golf Club in Princeton, NJ, Volweider,
president of the club, replied, "We didn't turn him down.  We didn't
accept him."

The Quaker Oats Company (1978):  Quaker Oats' Aunt Jemima frozen "Jumbo
Blueberry Waffles" were advertised as being made "With Real Blueberry
Buds and Other Natural Flavors".  On the back of the package, however,
the following ingredients were listed in small type:  "Blueberry Buds
(sugar, vegetable stearine [a release agent], blueberry solids with
other natural flavors, salt, sodium corboxymethyl cellulose [a
thickening agent], silicon dioxide [a flow agent], citric acid, modified
soy protein, artificial flavor, artificial coloring maltol)."