Lippard.Multics 1985-01-21 16:16:34 mst Mon Subject: Recent developments in software in Texas Date: Monday, 21 January 1985 16:08 mst From: Charlie Spitzer Subject: From AI-List To: {mbx >udd>m>jjl>misc>misc} Date: Thu, 17 Jan 85 11:39 CDT From: quintanar Subject: Software Development RECENT DEVELOPMENTS IN SOFTWARE IN TEXAS (first in a series) by Dr. Joe Bob VonNeumann Software Engineer, Texas Software and Military University Mass Destruction Lab translated into English by Harry Bloomberg, University of Texas at Dallas This is the first in a series of papers describing recent advances in the science of software development at Texas S&M. These articles will be written with the non-software type in mind, so that others may attempt to understand software with the proper amounts of awe and reverence. This month's paper will cover two topics: 1) a new sorting algorithm and 2) an application of Ohm's Law to computing. THE MONKEY SORT The following pseudo-code describes a new sorting algorithm that was discovered by a project at the Generally Dynamic Corporation that has since been classified Top Secret so that the designers' names could not be associated with their work. Procedure monkey_sort(n,keys) / n is the number of items to be sorted/ / keys is an array that contains the data to be sorted/ BEGIN / create all possible permutations of keys/ do i = 1 to n! by n / it's below my dignity to write so trivial a procedure as permute, so some day I'll pay some kid just out of school to write it / / create a unique permutation of the data in key and save it in array memory./ call permute(key,memory,n) end do / search for the permutation that happens to be in the right order / do i = 1 to n! by n j = 1 while ((memory(j+i-1) < memory(j+i)) and j <> n) do j = j + 1 end while if j = n then / we found the right permutation! / print (memory(i+k-1),k=1 to n) exit end if end do END monkey_sort The above sort's creators have affectionately named it the "Monkey Sort" after the old tale that if enough monkeys were given word processing equipment they would eventually write either "War and Peace" or 500 lines of error-free Fortran code. However, industrial software managers should be warned that this is not a very effective software development methodology, as case studies of many DoD sponsored projects have shown. Monkey sort does fill two critical needs. First, utilization of processors and memory on future VHISIC-based systems will improve by several orders of magnitude. The extreme step of investing time and money in efficient High Order Language compilers would therefore be justified. Second, the systems engineer will now have a baseline against which to compare other algorithms. This is so close to the way the RF community measures antenna gains that we may refer to Monkey Sort as an Isotropic Process. Algorithms may be compared in decibels, which project managers are more likely to understand than bounding software by a polynomial. For example, a new CS graduate, rather than reporting "One algorithm is O(2n) and the other is only O(n)," can now tell his boss than one is 3 dB faster than another relative to Isotropic. AN OHM'S LAW FOR COMPUTING With the withdrawal of Texas Instruments, Timex, and Mattel from the home computer market, we can now announce the vital role that these corporations played in the discovery of the basic particle of computation. Just as the atom can be split into electrons, neutrons and protons, it has been discovered that software can be divided into automatrons. Further, it has been shown that these particles obey the famous Ohm's Law (V = I * R) with only slight modifications: - "I" now represents automatron flow through the computer system. - "V" represents the Electrocomputive Force (ECF). This may be thought of as the demand for computing. Research indicates that ECF is a O(2**n) function where n represents the number of times project managers ask "Are all the bugs out of the software yet?" - "R" is the computational resistance and is directly proportional to the number of Ph.Ds assigned to a project. The automatron was discovered recently with the aid of the Fermi National Lab's 1024 Gbaud bit smasher. Thousands of surplus TI 99/4As, Timex 1000s and Aquarious systems were hurled into lead walls at speeds approaching the speed of light. Whatever was not consumed by the energy of the collision was collected into bit buckets and carefully measured and examined. The key to the data analysis effort was application of a basis of modern computer science: bits are like energy, in that they may be neither created nor destroyed. The Fermi Lab scientists found many parity and checksum errors on their instrumentation tapes and came to the conclusion that the missing bits could be explained only through the existence of previously unknown discrete packets of computational power -- automatrons. Research in the field of computational physics is increasing at an alarming rate. Scientists at MIT have found that the automatron can be further divided into even smaller particles called nu-trons. The recently announced NU-machine and NU-bus extensively use materials that act as nu-tron super-conductors. Unfortunately, further nu-tron applications have been stymied by a patent infringement lawsuit filed by Nairobi University (NU). This suit claims that a machine has been built from parts of two-horned four- legged animals that roam the plains of Africa. This machine is called the Gnu-machine. NEXT: Dr. VonNeumann explores advances Texas S&M has made in the field of Confusibility Theory. Biographical data: Dr. Joe Bob VonNeumann earned his BSEE from Faber College, his MSCS at Darwin College, and his PhD at the elite Swiss Naval Academy (best known as the organization that lost a competition with the Swiss Army to produce a multi-role pocket knife). Before joining Texas S&M, Joe Bob developed high probability-of-kill mechanical systems for use against rodent threats for DeConn Labs. Dr. VonNeumann relaxes by fishing in the Trinity River (he recently traded in his bass boat for a gefilte boat) and by chasing after single women in bars (favorite opening line: "Do you do assembly language?"). Dr. VonNeumann is currently on a Leave of Absence to document the mating habits of software people so that he may discover why there are so few of them. Dr. VonNeumann would like to hear any feedback on this paper. He is especially interested in directed automatron-beam weapon applications for use in the "Star Wars" program.